This is a vagulely chronoligical list of media that has shaped who I am today.
I love movies :)
Resan till Melonia by Per Åhlin. Childhood favourite. Contributed heavily to my love for animation. In the movie, one of the characters make a soup, while recounting all the ingredients. Me and my brother always loved that scene and one day we begged our dad to make the soup. And because he is the best dad ever, he did! He modified the recipie a bit, so we would actually like it, but it has become a staple meal in our family.
SOPOR by Tage Danielsson. I have watched this movie so many times I can probobly act it out it in full without any problems. Still, every time I rewatch it, I find some new joke I didn't understand last time. It has a lot of political satire that flew over my head as a kid, which I now can understand and laugh at. Some jokes I will never understand, because I don't know enough about the politicians that are satirised, unless I, like, ask my dad or something.
I watched these three movies by myself when my mom got access to a bunch of movies in connection to the 2021 Göteborg Film Festival. As far as I remember, this was the first time I watched any movie alone, out of my own volition. Before this I generally just watched movies with family. I consider this the start of my interest in film.
Hytti nro 6 by Juho Kuosmanen. Saw Yura Borisov for the first time and didn't know what to do with myself.
Капитан Волконогов бежал by Natalya Merkulova & Alexey Chupov. Saw Yura Borisov for the second time, with full skinhead getup on, and REALLY didn't know what to do with myself.
Große Freiheit by Sebastian Meise. First time I saw Franz Rogowski, and was enamoured my him. The start of my love for actors with "real" faces.
Yeah...
Fight Club by David Fincher. I watched this with J, before we had figured it all out. That day we had hung around on a playground, being loud and obnoxious. I noticed that the few people who passed through the playground looked nervous, avoiding us as best they could. It felt wonderful in a sick way, to be feared, to be avoided. That night we watched this movie, that night I broke down. I saw myself, who I wanted to be. This movie showed me, that, which had been covered by a wax coating of 2020-tiktok-goblincore-sweaterpaws-gayboi ever since I entered puberty. This movie dug its hand into my chest and squeezed sweaty, horny, repulsive, writhing life into my heart. It grabbed me by the dick and balls and asked me if I wanted them. It showed me my own Tyler Durden, an agressive, sexual, unapologetic masculinity. I was instinctually disgusted with it, disgusted with myself for ever wanting to be that kind of man. I swore to never become it, never become Tyler, but that promise didn't last long. This movie made me a man, made me a fag, made me horny, made me angry, all of it for the first time. It broke my shell. There's not many movies that can to that shit to someone.
La Haine by Mathieu Kassovitz. Vinz, please give me a chance.
Eastern Promises by David Cronenberg. Jesus Fucking Christ, I will write this once I have collected all my thoughts. Watch it please.
When I was a young child he only thing I remember doing is reading. I always had a book with me, up until I was around 10 years old, which was when I started being on the internet instead.
As a kid I always really loved reading decadent descriptions of things, often times descriptions of food. My favorite part of the Harry Potter-series (that I have chose NOT to include on the list) was the illusion of intricacy in the world that I could sit and think about for hours.
Ada Goth,
Bliss Bakery,
Nowadays, I still adore intricate descriptions, but I have grown more appreciative of character construction, the relationships and dialogue. I think this illustrates something that happened in me as I grew older. I didn't meet a peer I truly liked being around until I was 13, and that opened my eyes to a whole new concept: other humans that were interesting.
Towards the Light by Andrej Djakov. I fell deeply in love with the Metro universe through this book, I read it before the main series. I love the dynamics between the characters, this book was the first time I recognised the found family trope outside of fanfiction. Well, I guess this could count as fanfiction... Let's say it was the first time seeing the trope in a published book. Again with detailed descriptions of different worlds.
Metro 2033 by Dmitrij Gluhovskij, sadly only the first book in this series. I can't get enough of the dialogues, borderline monologues, in this book. The characters somehow manage go on and on in a way that doesn't feel like an attack on the senses.
När hundarna kommer by Jessica Schiefauer. There are so many layers to the insanity of this book. Insane that we read this book in school. Insane that we read this gay ass book, inspired by the very real and tragic murder of John Hron at the hands of skinheads, in a school that was once one of the only place in Stockholm where skinhead youth were vaguely welcome to hang out. Insane that I had to write reading logs about this. How am I supposed to write anything about this book that I can hand in to a teacher without being suspended for being a fucking freak in the head!!! Did Schiefauer not read the very words she wrote down??? Jessica, if you ever see this; you wrote some of the best homoerotic tension I have ever read and I hate you for making me point it out in front of my class and teacher, who all responded with the blankest faces I've ever seen. FUCK YOU.